“Traveler, there is no path; the path must be forged as you walk.” Antonio Machado
“Our highest calling is to grow into our own authentic selfhood, whether or not it conforms to some image of what others think we ought to be. In doing so, we find not only the joy that every human being seeks but also our path of authentic service in the world.” Parker J. Palmer
“The whole secret of a successful life is to find out what is one’s destiny to do, and then do it.”― Henry Ford
“‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” Jesus Christ.
An invitation to become a trailblazer
“Traveler, there is no path. The path must be forged as you walk.” Antonio Machado
Life is a journey. And a lot of people feel that finding and living their calling is something that should be handed to them on stone tablets like the ten commandments. But the brave souls who have dared to find and live their calling would disagree. Barring some rare, miraculous divine intervention, no baby is born with their purpose and calling written out clearly for them. They must live life to discover it. They must blaze their own trail. Yet, we are not without much help. Even our DNA, the time, season, place, and setting of our birth–even such simple things as the political and economic climate– like a prophecy all connive and work with us to shape our purpose, calling, and destiny. As you live, being self-aware, learning, and reflecting from the life around you and your experiences, you soon develop the faith that helps you see that your calling lies right in front of you in plain sight.
The following poem by
― Border of a Dream
The desire you have to find your purpose, calling, and meaning in life is your invitation to blaze your own trail. Take it, and you will never regret it. But expect to walk by faith, not by sight.
The Journey of Life only makes sense looking backward
For most people, the first shock is usually the realization that there is no well-worn path for them to travel. The path is made as they walk. After they’ve recovered from that knock, they soon blindsided again when they realize that the path doesn’t make sense looking forward. The forward march on the journey of purpose is a spiritual journey. It’s one borne through faith. And it’s the only way to find purpose and meaning and fulfillment in life. If you wait to connect all the dots, you will never move forward. You can only connect the dots when looking backward, not forwards.
The renowned 19th-century Danish philosopher, Soren Kierkegaard, noticed this truth when he remarked, “Life can only be understood backward, but it must be lived forward.”
How do you live forward without understanding, you may ask? By faith.
During his famous Stanford University commencement, Steve Jobs, the revered founder of Apple Computers, expressed the same realization. “You can’t connect the dots looking forward”, Mr. Jobs said, “you can only connect them looking backward. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.”
In my research, this is how the greatest men who ever walked the face of the earth have lived. They have been able to pursue big hairy audacious goals that impact humanity at large because they have believed that it will all make sense in the future when they look backward. They have trusted in God, their guts, karma, etc. They have all walked by faith, not by sight.
If you want to walk the path of the great, if you want to thread the path to purpose, meaning, and fulfillment, you also must be ready to walk by faith and connect the dots backward instead of waiting for them to connect forwards. Because they never connect forwards.
Find Your Calling, Element, or Sweet Spot
“He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.” – Friedrich Nietzsche
Design defines destiny. Form follows function.
Your journey to greatness begins when you discover what your calling is, and take the first step toward fulfilling that calling. If you want to achieve greatness, it starts with finding your purpose, your calling, your element, or your sweet spot. It’s only when you find what drives you, what you were created to do, that you start shining.
I’ve spent the last decade interested and researching greatness and what it takes to become great. I do this because I want to feed my soul the food that great people eat so that if I am fortunate, I too may someday rest among the great. I do it because there is a fire in my bones, a passion, to study greatness and to teach it to my children and to the world.
C.S. Lewis said the following during a 1939 sermon at a church in Oxford:
“I think it was Matthew Arnold who first used the English word spiritual in the sense of the German geistlich, and so inaugurated this most dangerous and most anti-Christian error. Let us clear it forever from our minds.The work of a Beethoven, and the work of a chairwoman, become spiritual on precisely the same condition, that of being offered to God, of being done humbly “as to the Lord”. This does not, of course, mean that it is for anyone a mere toss-up whether he should sweep rooms or compose symphonies. A mole must dig to the glory of God and a cock must crow. We are members of one body, but differentiated members, each with his own vocation. A man’s upbringing, his talents, his circumstances, are usually a tolerable index of his vocation. If our parents have sent us to Oxford, if our country allows us to remain there, this is prima facie evidence that the life which we, at any rate, can best lead to the glory of God at present is the learned life.” C.S. Lewis, Learning in War-Time, sermon preached in the church of St. Mary the Virgin, Oxford, Autumn 1939.
In this article, I share with you my findings expressed in the form of a mnemonic I’ve created called, D.E.S.I.G.N. This mnemonic is especially fitting because the key to finding our calling is understanding our design. It starts with self-awareness and self-evaluation to discover what endowments and talents we have been given. Calling is both something you discover and something you choose. Your life is both something you are given and something you co-create.
Before I get into the DESIGN acrostic, it’s important to remember that a calling presumes a caller. That we have been created presumes a creator. That we have gifts presumes a giver. Although the principles shared in this book are in line with the most up-to-date evidence in the social sciences, I approach it from a spiritual standpoint, specifically the Judaeo-Christian worldview. I believe that atheists and people of all faiths will benefit from this book even if they don’t share the same faith in God that under-girths the book.
A relationship with God–the caller, creator, and giver of gifts is crucial to effective discernment of calling. Jesus said, “My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me” (John 10:27). As you will see later, all calling is a spiritual phenomenon. The call is easier to hear when one is walking side-by-side or in step with the caller (God), in the context of an ongoing loving relationship. We live in a world with many voices that are vying for our attention. Knowing God will facilitate hearing him and hearing what he is calling you to do with the life he has given you.
With that said, we get into DESIGN.
D.E.S.I.G.N stands for:
D – Desires, delights, and dreams inspired by the needs of others.
E – Experiences (past and present).
S – Spirit’s leading (Spiritual Enlightenment)
I – Interests and Passions for serving others.
G – Gifts (natural and spiritual).
N – Nature (personality and character).
Related Article: Finding Your Passion is Like Choosing a Spouse.
| Calling is where our passions, gifts, and values meet the world’s needs.
Understanding our DESIGN
Our DESIGN comes from both our genes and our environment. We are a work in progress. Our DESIGN is both something that has been done to us and is being done to us that is outside our control and something that we can consciously participate in and do to ourselves to influence the trajectory that our lives take. This is a very important concept to grasp. We not completely controlled by external forces and we are also not complete masters of our destiny. That’s an often told lie. But our influence is crucial to determining our DESIGN which in turn determines the course and quality of our lives.
To use a common scientific expression, our DESIGN comes from both nature and nurture. Nature refers to our genes and nurture refers to the environment we grow up in, which determines the experiences we have. For example, we know that your personality is determined by both genetic and environmental influences during your childhood years. Dreams and passions change with time and experience. The things you are interested in change over time. If you want to see a clear manifestation of this change, spend time with a child between the ages of two to six.
Your talents are innate or natural. You were born with them. However, your experiences and education provide knowledge and skills that can sharpen or inhibit your talents and gifts. You can’t change your genes but your behavior can influence the expression of those genes. You cannot control everything that happens to you, but you can influence how you experience it. All of that influences your DESIGN, which in turn determines the course of your life.
Related Article: Talent vs. Skills.
I’ve found out that to find your DESIGN, you look at the following six areas. I created the acronym DESIGN to help people easily remember these six areas.
Related Article: Our DESIGN influences our perception of the world.
The elements of our DESIGN work together and influence each other
Notice that the six things in our DESIGN work together and influence each other. For example, when I was very young, about 5 years old, I started desiring to become a physician. That was my dream. How did a little boy in a small village in Cameroon come to that dream? My experience exposed me to a societal need (service opportunity) and I saw someone serving others in a way that inspired me. When my dad died at a young age when I was nine years old because he didn’t have adequate access to healthcare, that no doubt made an impact on me. When my beloved grandmother who suffered from diabetes and hypertension dropped dead, possibly from a heart attack or stroke, that experience made an impact on me. As time passed and I continued to dream this dream, it is no doubt that my personality(nature), and my natural gifts (that included excellence in the sciences) played a role in keeping that dream alive. As I matured, the inner sense of knowing that medicine was the right path for me confirmed everything. And providence provided for me as I walked on my path towards the doctor that I am today. It was like walking along in the direction of the wind so that the wind entered my sails and made my journey so much easier and lighter. When we follow our DESIGN, we walk in the direction of the wind. When we don’t follow it, we walk against the wind and everything is hard and unfulfilling.
Listen to your life
You were designed on purpose. It’s not a coincidence that you were born at the time that you were born. Your sex, race, height, natural gifts, spiritual gifts, social connections, etc are not without purpose. They are a gift to you. Your life is a message to you. It carries clues about your life purpose. Your form determines your function. Listening to your life, assessing yourself, and knowing who you really are is the key to understanding your calling. The DESIGN mnemonic below gives people a great way to start listening to their lives and finding their purpose.
1. Desires, delights, and dreams Inspired by Serving Others
What do you love?
What makes you happy?
“Dreams usually start out as single-cell desires.” Mark Batterson
“Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” King David
If you could create a better future and had the power and resources to bring it about, what would that future look like? Allow yourself to dream wildly and paint a clear picture of that better future.
Desires of the heart
Calling is all about serving others and making the world a better place. The desires, hopes, interests, ambitions, dreams, passions, motivations, and affections that you have that can serve others are a good sign of what you should be doing with your life.
What do you love to do?
What do you care about?
What are your desires, delights, dreams, and drives?
Dreams (the power of imagination)
Think of the following quotes.
“Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.” Norman Vincent Peale
“The life God has for you is in your imagination.” Steve Harvey
“Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.” Albert Einstein
“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” C. S. Lewis
Your calling is in your dreams. Look there.
Related Article: Faith is vision.
Our dreams must be tethered or anchored to something that is bigger than ourselves and that is outside of us. That is the needs of others in the world around us. All of us are created and called to serve each other. That is our first and foremost calling. When we talk about finding our calling, it’s a matter of finding how we are best suited to serve societal needs around us. Each of us is called to a tribe (a people) to serve. We are also called to belong to a tribe that is made of servants serving others. For example, all medical professionals are part of a tribe that is dedicated to taking care of the health of others.
Societal Needs / Service Opportunities
What needs do you see in the world around you? Which of them appeals to you? Which of them is found in your dreams or most closely matches your dreams? Which of them fits the rest of your DESIGN? What is your tribe?
Related Article: The Calling Bias.
You were born for such a time as this. In the ancient story of Esther, the young Esther is married to the King when the greatest need and challenge that her people have ever faced arose. Esther is hesitant to take that problem head-on and try to solve it because there was a real risk she could lose her life in the process. Mordecai, her adopted father who raised her, challenges her to tackle the problem, telling her, in essence, that if she has been called and positioned in the palace to solve this problem and she let’s fear to stop her, she will actually perish. But the service opportunity that the problem gives her would be given to another person. Mordecai ended her encouragement by saying, “And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this”.
Each of us is placed where we are for such a time as this. We are born in our day to meet the challenges of our day. People often think that opportunities for service are still in the future. The season for service is still months ahead. But the truth is, if we open our eyes, lift up our heads and look, we will see that the fields are ripe for harvest. That harvest is the opportunity that abounds for us to serve others. These service opportunities provide a means to fulfill our calling, draw wages to meet our needs, and earn a handsome eternal reward in the process.
I’m reminded of the words of Jesus, “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” When you seek opportunities to serve others, you will discover there are opportunities all around you. The rest of your design would help you know which service opportunities you are being called to take.
Your calling is found within the service opportunities (societal needs) of your time. You are being called to service. Your calling is a calling to service. Start looking there.
A) Needs that beckon or summon our hearts, minds, and strength
We are designed and created to serve others around us. We are not called to live for ourselves but for the service and benefit of others and the greater good. Yet, we cannot ignore our own fundamental human needs because it is only by fulfilling our fundamental human needs that we can best serve those around us.
If you have flown in planes you are likely familiar with the wise advice from the hostesses, “In the unlikely event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will drop down from the panel above your head… Secure your own mask before helping others.” Securing your own mask first before helping others is not an act of selfishness but a preparation to serve others well. The same is true for our own personal needs. We are designed and called to serve others with our DESIGN. In the process of serving others, our own needs are met. It’s impossible to give our best to serve others while ignoring our own needs. That’s why I believe that if our work isn’t meeting our personal needs, it’s probably not our calling. However, our needs are best viewed not as ends in themselves but as means to an end. The end is serving others.
Personal & Societal Needs
There are two types of needs that are important when it comes to calling. They are personal needs and societal needs. Both are very important.
Personal Needs
The fact that we are uniquely designed obviously means that we have unique needs. Each of us has 7 fundamental human needs. Our needs are part of our design and they are fulfilled when we serve within our sweet spot. Yet, to find our calling, we don’t focus on our needs. We focus on the needs of others in the world around us without ignoring our own needs. Work that we are called to do must provide fully for our personal needs. In addition to that, I think it’s as if there are certain needs in the world that have our names written on them. These needs seem to be beckoning us to come. The truth is that as we meet the needs of others, our own needs become met. Our calling is found in meeting the needs of others. We are called to serve others, not ourselves.
Related article: The 7 Fundamental human needs.
It’s powerful to realize that needs are part of our design. Our 7 fundamental human needs and the needs of others are part of who we are. Our needs are met as we meet the needs of others in the world. Just as hunger causes us to seek food, our own needs are designed to cause us to look for needs in the world to meet. The needs of others are the solution to our needs, and our needs remind us that we are designed to serve others! That’s a powerful concept to grasp. Our needs aren’t there to cause us to look for charity or handouts from others. Our needs are a reminder that we need to serve others because by serving others, our needs become met.
“While not everyone can become financially rich through their Element, everyone is entitled to be enriched by it.” Sir Ken Robinson.
Societal Needs
The needs of the world provide opportunities to live out our calling and meet our own needs. The key is choosing a need that fits our design, who we are.
All of us are called to be servants. What we have to figure out is what service opportunities we will thrive in. As such, it helps to have an inventory of the needs in the world around you. For many people, globalization has made the whole world your neighborhood and everyone in the world your neighbor. So your calling may be farther from your home than it might have been for generations past.
When asked about how one might go about finding their calling, a pragmatic colleague once said, “The first thing to consider is the needs of the world. The single strongest indicator of your calling is probably your awareness of what needs to get done to make the world more as it should be. This doesn’t necessarily mean you have to tackle a huge global problem. It simply means anything in the world that needs to get done. Considerations such as earning a living to support yourself and your family are a necessary part of the equation. It’s not smart to get a job serving and meeting the needs of orphans only to neglect your own children.”
I agree wholeheartedly!
I also think that just like we can eat food-like substances and still be hungry and unnourished, we can be busy doing work that seems like food to our souls only to remain hungry and unsatisfied because that’s not our true calling. One of the hints that we are working in our true calling is that like nourishing food, the work satisfies our souls and gives us meaning.
Our endowments are gifts that we’ve been given to give to the world. The only true way to give that give is to give in with a cheerful heart. Your work, your calling is your gift to the world. If you don’t feel cheerful and happy to be giving your gift of work to those you serve, there is something wrong. Perhaps you are giving the wrong gift or to the wrong people.
I think the first 5 aspects of our DESIGN prepare and point us towards the last one, which is the needs of the world.
Activity
Create a list of needs in the world around you. Use your design to narrow a list like that to service opportunities that align with your dreams and passions, your past experiences, and the rest of your design.
B) Our tribe inspires, empowers, and supports us
We cannot serve everyone well. When we try to serve everyone, we serve no one. We are called to a people, our tribe. You cannot discern your calling or live it out alone. Connecting with people who share your same passions and calling can have tremendous benefits for you and for them. Major benefits include inspiration, affirmation, guidance, collaboration, and support.
Our tribe includes many different groups of people. One group is the group we serve. For example, if we are called to serve orphans and the poor, orphans will be a part of your tribe. But so too will be other people who are serving orphans directly and others who have served orphans directly in the past. Those who have a heart for orphans and support financially are also part of your tribe as are those who educate, train, and prepare people to serve orphans and vulnerable children. When understood well, our tribes are large enough to provide all the help we will ever need to achieve our calling.
**Remember these truths about calling: 1) We can have more than one calling. 2) Our calling is often seasonal, not for a lifetime. But a season of calling can last years or even decades. Yet, some people, a season of calling can last a lifetime.
2. EXPERIENCES (past & present)
Which experiences have formed you? And how do you see yourself as a result?
What experiences has God been providing for you recently? Do they suggest anything about calling?
Your life is a story. It is part of a larger story that began long before you were born and will continue long after you die. Your life is your act in this larger human story. Our life experiences are the building blocks of our story. Your story is weaved together by your experiences. The experiences we go through shape us and are a crucial part of our design process.
Related article: 5 Ways to Inventory your Life story.
Here are some truths to think about:
- Your life is like a piece of tapestry that is woven together by your experiences.
- You don’t create your life, you co-create it.
- Your life design is not complete at birth, your surroundings (society you grow up and live in, the culture, etc) and your choices continue to design your life till you die. We are indeed a work in progress.
- When you look at what makes a life successful, individual effort is like the tip of the iceberg. It’s very small compared to the other factors beyond individual control that determine the success of our life. Yet, individual effort is indispensable. We just can’t have a successful life without it. We can’t do it alone but without us, it can’t be done.
Each of us is a story. Looking at our experiences gives us an opportunity to look backward and read our own life story, as far back in our ancestral line as we can. For me, it goes to my father. For others, it may go further than that. For some who may not even know their father or mother, it begins with their earliest memories or stories they learn about them when they were babies.
I believe that there are no coincidences.
If you want to know where a person is going, look at where they are coming from. Our past doesn’t determine our future. It always has clues about our future. Life is a journey. When we look at the past, we get a hint of the future. Look at your life’s story. Especially look at the pleasurable events, the painful events, and engagements we have made in the past. The hurts we go through in life never go in vain. The things we’ve enjoyed in the past also have a lot to teach us about what we will enjoy in the future. Our past engagements also tell us something about our design.
“God never wastes a hurt” Rick Warren
Our pain often helps us see our purpose in life
Many people who were abused as children devote their lives to making sure others aren’t abused.
Many people who experience marriage struggles and overcame them have devoted themselves to helping others create healthy marriages. Jimmy and Karen Evans, the founders of Marriage Today, had a lot of struggles early in their marriage that almost lead to divorce. Since 1994, they’ve been devoted to helping others strengthen their marriages.
Many people have become lawyers or advocates of justice that devote themselves to helping others find justice because they themselves experience cruel injustice and they want to make sure no one suffers the same fate.
Many people become doctors because of an experience with illness either by themselves or by a loved one that left a mark on them.
Many people become teachers because they experienced the kindness and generosity of a teacher who left a mark on them as a child.
Many cancer survivors have devoted their lives to starting foundations that help others beat cancer or at least deal with it with dignity.
Actor Michael J. Fox’s experience with Parkinson’s led him to found a Parkinson’s foundation that is working to find the cure. Today, his organization is the largest nonprofit funder of Parkinson’s research in the world.
I started an orphan care organization because I grew up suffering as a child and I wanted to help others with that faith.
My desire to become a doctor was strengthened by the experiences I had as a child seeing my father and my grandmother suffer and die from illnesses.
Pleasure is also as powerful
Many people have become accomplished musicians because their love for music was discovered when they were merely children.
Many people have pursued their love for sports to have great careers in sports.
Many people have pursued their love for STEM subjects to lead amazing careers in science, technology, engineering, and mathematics.
Tiger Woods started playing tennis as a child.
The Williams sisters (Venus and Serena) started playing tennis as children.
Reading your life backward and paying attention to pains, pleasures, and engagements will open our minds to see how our DESIGN has guided us in the past, even without our knowledge.
As we take an inventory of our life experiences and write down our story, it’s crucial to query how we have met our 7 fundamental human needs in the past.
Related Article: The 7 Fundamental Human Needs
Another important way to look at our experiences is to view them in terms of the 4 dimensions of the human being (soul).
Recent / Current Experiences
What kinds of opportunities is God providing for you lately? Do they suggest anything about calling? Sometimes, doors and opportunities that God is opening may–when they agree with the other elements of DESIGN– suggest the Lord’s guidance. If everything else seems to point that God is calling one to preach and there are no invitations or opportunities to do so, one needs to reassess and be patient. Sometimes, the calling one is sensing maybe for a future time. For example, Joseph’s dreams were his calling and David’s anointing constitute calling. However, in each case, it took over a decade for the calling to be launched. Current experiences can serve as providential circumstances that guide one onto their calling. Again, as with the whole matter of calling, these should be interpreted in relationship with God and in prayer and reliance on the Holy Spirit.
3. Spirit’s Leading (the Spirit & His Word)
Spirit’s leading / Still small voice / Sense of guidance / Spiritual Enlightenment
The Spirit always leads in accordance with the word.
“Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives.” Paul of Tarsus
“The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.” Albert Einstein
If you look up the word calling in a dictionary, you would see definitions like the following:
- Calling is “a strong inner impulse toward a particular course of action especially when accompanied by conviction of divine influence” Merriam Webster’s Dictionary
- Calling is “a strong urge towards a particular way of life or career; a vocation” Oxford Dictionary
- Calling is “a strong impulse or inclination.” Dictionary.com
- Calling is “an inner urge or a strong impulse, especially one believed to be divinely inspired.” The thefreedictionary.com, first entry.
- Calling is “a strong inner urge to follow an occupation, etc; vocation”. The thefreedictionary.com, 2nd entry.
- Calling is “a strong impulse or inclination.” The thefreedictionary.com, 3rd entry.
Calling is a deeply spiritual thing. Notice that I have not said that calling is a religious thing, only that it’s a spiritual thing. When we think of calling, we think of something outside ourselves. It’s incomplete to talk about calling and vocation without talking about the spiritual. We all have an inner sense (also called an inner voice, inner witness, instinct, intuition) that gently offers guidance, sometimes convicts and at other times affirms and defends us. Our inner sense confirms our calling and gives us a sense of knowing that words can’t adequately describe. Revelation through the inner sense together with the revelation that comes through nature constitutes what is sometimes called general revelation. That is contrasted to the specific revelation that comes through religious texts and direct divine interaction with individuals. General revelation is so-called because it is available to all human beings.
Even major religions like Christianity acknowledge this truth. I’m reminded of the words of Paul, the famous Christian leader. He said, “When Gentiles, who do not have the law, do by nature things required by the law, they are a law for themselves, even though they do not have the law. They show that the requirements of the law are written on their hearts, their consciences also bearing witness, and their thoughts sometimes accusing them and at other times even defending them.” Paul of Tarsus in Romans 2:14-15. According to Paul, even people who don’t have his religion can instinctively do right that accords with the law.
The Inner Self
When we think of the inner witness, we think of the inner self because the inner witness comes to us through the agency of our inner self.
The human soul is made up of 4 aspects as shown: The Spirit, Mind, Body, and Social Relatedness. The inner self is simply the term that covers the spirit and the mind and the outer-self is a term that describes the physical body and social relatedness. I also call the inner self, the inner soul.
The inner-self embodies concepts like our:
– Spirit (heart/will). From this, we talk about spirituality, values, and truth.
– Mind (thoughts and emotions). the mental make-up or structure that causes each of us to think, act, and feel the way we do).
Related Article: What is the inner self?
Spirituality
An AAFP piece described spirituality nicely. It said, “Spirituality is the way you find meaning, hope, comfort, and inner peace in your life. Many people find spirituality through religion. Some people find it through music, art, or a connection with nature. Others find it in their values and principles.” Am Fam Physician. 2001 Jan 1;63(1):89.
The National Wellness Institute defines spirituality as “the search for meaning and purpose in human existence”. I agree that spirituality is the search for meaning and purpose. However, I think spirituality is also a search for truth.
Leadership expert, Simon Sinek wrote a book titled, Start with Why: How great leaders inspire others to action. He also gave a TED talk on the subject that has become one of the most popular TED talks of all time. Sinek uses the examples of Martin Luther King Jr, the Wright brothers, and Apple to show that great leaders inspire action by starting with why.
While the rest of the DESIGN acronym helps guide you to find “what” you should do with your life and “how” you should do it, only spirituality has the power to give you a “why”. Even if you don’t know it, everybody has some level of spirituality. Out of our spirituality comes our values, beliefs, sense of meaning, and purpose. All these are crucial to finding our individual calling.
Words like our intuition, our instincts, conscience, the inner voice of truth belong within the scope of spirituality. Spirituality is how we develop and feed our moral compass. Our spirituality also helps us clearly articulate our personal philosophy.
Enhancing your inner sense
When it comes to our inner sense or instincts, even though we are all created equal, we don’t all live in the same zip code. Some people are very highly attuned to their instincts and so enjoy the benefits while others ignore them altogether. Because of soul conditions created by some people, their inner awareness or inner witness/instincts become stronger and more distinct, more perceptible, clearer, and louder than that of the average person. It is also possible to silence the inner sense through a lifestyle that doesn’t feed the inner life.
Those who have become masters in the inner sense practice certain habits that help them develop their inner sense and grow and mature in their ability to work with it.
Here are some of these practices:
- Renewing the mind with truth regularly.
- Building life on strong values
- Practicing spirituality
- Self-awareness
- Meditation, prayer, etc
The way to develop the inner witness is to constantly renew your mind with truth and to feed your spirit through the practice of the disciplines of the spirit/spiritual disciplines.
Recommended Resources
- Instinct: The Power to Unleash Your Inborn Drive by TDJakes.
- Fundamental human needs as fundamental human instincts.
4. Interests and Passions for Serving Others
“Vocation is where our greatest passion meets the world’s greatest need”― Frederick Buechner
“There is no passion to be found playing small — in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.” – Nelson Mandela
“Tell me what you like and I’ll tell you who you are.” John Ruskin
“God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied.” John Piper.
What do you really love to do?
Passion is something that we love to do, something that brings us satisfaction.
Are you one of the millions of people of faith around the world who have shied away from pursuing their passion because they are afraid that doing something they love may cause them to stray outside God’s will? I’ve seen John Piper’s words above bring freedom to many people like you. I’ve included that quote to inspire you to realize that you can pursue your purpose. In fact, according to Piper, your God actually wants you to pursue your passions because “God is most glorified in you when you are most satisfied in him.” Whether you are a person of faith or not, the best way to live a life of satisfaction is to live in your purpose and do something that you are passionate about on a daily basis.
Your life-giving passions are a strong indication of your sweet spot.
What if you don’t have any specific dreams and passions that you are aware of? Read my article, The different levels of passion.
Because our calling or design is all about service to others, it is recommended that we identify desires, delights, dreams –passions– in the following three areas:
- Role/Relationship – What do you like to do? What roles do you enjoy taking?
- People – What kind of people do you love to serve?
- Causes – What needs do you like to champion? What things do you like to change?
5. GIFTS (both natural and spiritual)
What are you good at? What do you excel in?
“Where your talents and the needs of the world cross; there lies your vocation.” Aristotle
“A man’s gift makes room for him, And brings him before great men.” King Solomon
“Fan into flame the gift of God that is in you” Paul of Tarsus
Gifts + Growth = Strengths
If you look at a dictionary, an endowment is defined as “a person’s natural gifts, talents, and qualities.” We have general and specific endowments.
General and Specific Endowments
General endowments are the endowments that are common to most human beings. For example, in Stephen Covey’s famous book, 7 Habits of highly effective people, he says, “Every human has four endowments – self-awareness, conscience, independent will and creative imagination. These give us the ultimate human freedom… The power to choose, to respond, to change.” These are examples of general endowments. When we develop and use these endowments, they will enable us to find our purpose and calling and help us to do meaningful work.
Specific endowments are gifts that differ from person to person and are very important in helping us identify our vocation. Michael Jordan, Celine Dion, Lionel Messi are gifted in specific ways that are different from most of us.
There is another sense in which the term endowment is used in the non-profit world, especially universities. For example, my alma mater, Rice University in Houston has a significant endowment which accorded to Forbes is estimated at $5.56 billion dollars in 2018. Harvard University has an even bigger endowment estimated at $36.45 billion in the same year.
An endowment is an asset (any asset) that is donated to a non-profit organization, such as a university, for the perpetual benefit of a non-profit institution. The donation is usually made with the requirement that the principal remain intact and money earned from investing the principal be used for a specific purpose. In the case of the university, the proceeds may be used to grant scholarships to low-income students.
In the broadest sense, an endowment is a donation that is given to a non-profit institution on the condition that it is used for the benefit of that organization. Most endowments are designed to provide a permanent source of income by keeping the original amount invested and using the accrued income from dividends for its charitable purpose.
|Your calling is your contribution to making the world a better place. It is irreplaceable. If you don’t do it, no one else can.
Your gifts are similar to the endowments of these universities. They may be seen as investments donated to us for the perpetual benefit of those in the world that we are called to serve. Rightly seen, we are not owners but stewards and trustees. We have been given the responsibility to steward the gifts that have been put into our care for the benefit of the world around us. The intention is for us to develop and grow the gift principal while at the same time using profits gained from wisely trading that gift to benefit those we have been called to serve.
In that sense, each of us is a nonprofit (purpose) organization. We have been endowed with gifts for the service of specific needs in the world around us. Our job is to grow the endowment that has been given to our purpose organization and use it perpetually to fulfill the purpose for which the gift was given.
Natural and Spiritual Gifts
In the Christian tradition, endowments are divided into natural and spiritual gifts. Natural gifts (also called talents) are given to all human beings at birth. Christian theology holds that at the time of conversion and after that, Christians are given spiritual gifts, which are empowerment from the Holy Spirit to serve the needs of the Church and the world. For more on the difference between natural and spiritual gifts, watch this lesson.
Talents (Gifts) vs. Strengths
The goal of identifying our talents/gifts is to develop them into strengths.
What is the difference between a talent and a strength?
Related article: Talent vs. Skills.
Related Article: Your Strengths Will Open Doors For You
Give cheerfully, quickly, and completely
Our talents are our gifts to the world. The attitude with which we must give our gifts is cheerfully, quickly, and completely. As freely as we have received, we should freely give.
What are your endowments or gifts? What things do you excel at with relatively more ease than others around you?
How do you know what you are good at?
- Becoming more self-aware is a good place to start.
- Consider Gallup’s StrengthsFinder.
Area, Roles/Relationship, and Environment/climate
To understand your strengths well so that you can discern your calling, it’s not enough to know what you are good at. You should also know what roles you are good at and what kind of environment or climate you thrive in. For example, you can be a good soccer player. Does that mean you are a good goalkeeper or good defender or good attacker? Are you the kind of person who likes to lead the team or are you very quiet and love to follow? Do you thrive in supportive teams or teams that are very competitive? Just knowing that you are a good soccer player is not enough. If you are the best defender in the world but are placed to play as an attacker or goalkeeper, you might be fired from the team for being a bad football player even when you could be the best defender in the world. When considering talent, you must also look at:
- Areas of strength. They are the topics or subjects you are good at. Are you good with numbers, plants, machinery, money, a team, a language, an audience, etc? Topics are seen in the things to which you apply strength.
- Roles/Relationships. In your area of strength, what relationship to others do you usually take? For example, are you the person in charge, follower, collaborator, team member, Lone Ranger? To see this, look at your story and see the roles you enjoy playing.
- Environment/climate. View yourself as a plant. What kind of soil, weather conditions, and climate do you thrive in? What are the optimal conditions for your success? In what environments do you thrive? Do you thrive on projects; in structured environments, in environments with little structure; in crises, setting goals, and focusing on them?
Your areas of strength, roles, and environment you thrive in have to do with your personality. You haven’t really understood your strengths until you know what specific areas, roles, and environment you thrive in because if you take a gifted person and put them in the wrong environment and role, they won’t perform well.
GROWTH & ATTITUDE
When John was five years old, he didn’t know his calling. By the time he was 25 years old, he knew his calling. The difference between the five-year-old John and the 25-year-old John can be summed up in one word, growth. Your growth and maturity level, as well as your attitude, influence your ability to discern your calling and to enter its fullest expression.
Understanding and growth are fundamental human needs of every human being. The level to which this need is met and one seeks understanding and growth will influence one’s ability to fully perceive and understand their calling in the world. Understanding and growth allow us to develop self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management. They allow us to develop our gifts into strengths and continuously learn to remain relevant and able to serve.
Growth
Your assignment always matches your maturity and paradigm. According to your faith, it shall be given to you. You grow into the fullest expression of your calling, one step at a time.
Imagine that you have a 5-year-old and a 50-year-old. Everything being equal,–in fact, assuming that this is the same person– the assignment or calling that can be given to a 5-year-old is different from what can be given to a 50-year-old. What sets them apart is their level of maturity. What sets them apart is years of growth and self-development physically, mentally, socially, and spiritually. Our personal development and the development of our community determine the extent and depth to which we can find and live our callings. If one were called to be a mathematician, their level of development in the field of mathematics will determine how influential and useful they would be in that field. There is a difference between the assignments that can be handled by an A-plus janitor and an F-minus janitor. Even though their difference is in degrees of effectiveness, these degrees of difference give these people very different experiences with their work and different levels of influence on those they serve that they may essentially be seen as different callings, even though it is the same exact job. Yet, what sets them apart is their level of growth and development. Everything held constant, the same is true for having a professional sports career in the major leagues vs. the minor leagues. It may be the same sports played but the different leagues are essentially different worlds with different levels of influence and rewards.
Attitude
To find your calling, you have to be willing to do what it takes. Your mindset or paradigm, your belief system, etc, all influence your ability to find your calling.
6. NATURE (Personality and Character)
Our nature is our personality or temperament. One’s personality is a gift. It’s not a liability or something to be managed. When we study our personality, it gives us a guide to how we have been gifted and what we have been called to do.
Understanding our personality will give us a clue as to:
- The roles we love to take.
- The kind of environment/climate we thrive in.
- How we recharge ourselves so that we can use our gifts to serve others as best as possible.
According to the APA, “personality refers to individual differences in characteristic patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving.” As such, personality is a product of a person’s inner self. A person’s spirit and mind determine their personality. As mentioned already, the forces of nature and nurture also help in determining our personality.
Knowing our nature/personality is about self-awareness. As servants to others, we must know who we are so that we can use ourselves as gifts to serve others effectively.
Common tools for assessing personality and growing in self-awareness include:
- DISC Personality Testing. DISC is a very useful personality test that is in the public domain. As a result, an institution may use it without fear of copyright infringements. A good resource to the DISC is Taking Flight! from Peoplekeys.com. The book comes with an access card to take a DISC assessment from https://app2.peoplekeys.com/
- Enneagram. This is an ancient personality typing system with 9 fundamental types. It has its origins from the Desert Fathers in early church history. Over the years, others have refined it. Its also in the public domain and can be used freely. A good introductory resource to the Enneagram is Ian Morgan Cron’s book, The Road Back to You. The authors also offer an Enneagram test on their website. Truity.com offers a free Enneagram test.
- Emotional Intelligence (EQ) tests e.g. from TalentSmart. They require you to buy their book Emotional Intelligence 2.0 to get the code. The book comes with a code to take an online EQ test. The Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkely has this free EQ test. From what I know, there are many EQ tests, and the science behind it is in the public domain.
Other tests that may help include the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) which is copyrighted and the Adjective Checklist Assessment, which is also copyrighted.
Identity
A very related concept to personality that also helps with discerning calling is identity. Identity answers the question, who am I? When one knows who he/she is, it has a way of clarifying what he/she should be doing, which is their calling.
Character
Your character determines the assignments that God gives you.
Related article: the Power of Individuality.
Confirming your Calling with your DESIGN.
Conclusion
To find your calling, you need to honestly evaluate yourself in light of the six keys I’ve discussed above. I’m absolutely certain that by looking into the mirror of these six keys, you will find who you truly are and what you were created to do.
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